I’m Kimberly Ann Hawes, and this is Rocky—my buddy, my boy, and my business partner in questionable decisions. Yes, he is a raccoon. The mask gave it away.
R.A.C.C.O.O.N.: Resourceful. Adaptable. Clever. Calculating. Opportunistic. Observant. Never waiting for permission.
That is the operating policy around here.
Rocky assesses the situation, works with what is available, and finds a way in without wasting an afternoon asking whether he is allowed. Frankly, it is a better operating system than most people have been sold—and Rocky does not even have thumbs.
THE UNFUCKABLE TIMES exists because I am past fifty, close enough to sixty to know better, and out of patience for fluffy advice, recycled millionaire slogans, and being told to manifest my way out of a problem somebody else is profiting from.
Here, we pull our shit together. We just zen the fuck out. We find the money, build the exit plan, protect our peace, improve the lifestyle, and stop allowing people, institutions, or old habits to play directly in our faces.
Some days that means Passport Profits and portable income. Some days it means dark psychology, boundaries, style, food, booze, travel, or the exact terminology required for modern foolishness. And when the political circus deserves a verbal uppercut, it will receive one.
From my desk, from my brain, and occasionally under the supervision of a small furry attorney with a warrant: useful information, sharp research, social satire, better moves, and no decorative nonsense.
Let’s unfuck your life.
— KAH